READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
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Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
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It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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