is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
