dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Drunk is not a location!
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
