The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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