He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
