wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I don't think brook has ever known best
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize