office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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