The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
