Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
