Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind

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(919): View more from North Carolina

the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.

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(678): View more from Georgia

just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.

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(740): View more from Ohio

It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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(970): View more from Colorado

dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..

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(408): View more from California

I miss the smell of you or some shit.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.

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(718): View more from New York

You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.

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