You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Randomize