I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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