great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
The feeling are messing with the penis
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?