So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
