she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
