i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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