My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize