My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
