Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.