He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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