You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
