I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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