brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize