Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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