It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
