My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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