weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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