I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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