I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
