Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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