Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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