i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
