Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
