Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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