I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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