every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
