Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
