i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
