1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
