Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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