how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
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