ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
