people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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