i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
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Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
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And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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