We should be called the Road Head Warriors
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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