The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
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