Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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