I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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