Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
