when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
